The 65-year-old 'America's Got Talent' got candid about his mental health issues.
Howie Mandel opened his heart! America's Got Talent judge said that he suffers from anxiety & OCD in a recent interview.
“I’m living in a nightmare…I try to anchor myself. I have a beautiful family and I love what I do. But at the same time, I can fall into a dark depression I can’t get out of,” Howie admitted to People magazine.
“There isn’t a waking moment of my life when ‘we could die’ doesn’t come into my psyche. But the solace I would get would be the fact that everybody around me was okay. It’s good to latch onto okay. But [during the pandemic] the whole world was not okay. And it was absolute hell,” he continued.
“People see inconsistencies, especially in the media. ‘Oh he hugged someone’ or ‘he shook someone’s hand.’ I can shake your hand. But then I’d think I didn’t wash it well enough. And I’d go back and forth in a loop washing my hands for hours. I understand the funny in that. But it doesn’t mean it isn’t incredibly painful. And I don’t want to defend my mental health. I just want to maintain it.”
“My life’s mission is to remove the stigma. I’m broken. But this is my reality. I know there’s going to be darkness again – and I cherish every moment of light,” Howie concluded.